Be True to Thy Self!!!

A Woman’s Worth Is Far More Than Rubies. Proverbs 31:10

Woe is me… A popular song women choose to sing on certain holidays and during this time of year. Tis the season! Wedding bells are ringing, extravagant cakes with four to five tiers are being baked, expensive wedding gowns and bridesmaid dresses are shopped for as we speak. Although, through it all there are female participants in the festivities and bystanders wondering, moaning… “Why not me?”

Always a bridesmaid never a bride.

A couple of female friends and I sit comfortably in my living room sipping wine and playing catch up. The conversation is wonderful then here it comes. The mood takes a turn that I have no interest in because they always hate my outlook. I’m not wielding pom- poms! All from one jealous statement. “Why is Susan getting married?” “When will it be my turn?” Faces turn red, eyes are rolled! Negative and slandering statements are made about the soon- to- be bride. The male bashing begins!!! I reach for my wine in aggravation! Thinking about the character of each woman as a glance around the room. Two, are not married for good reason!!! No shade! My friends are quite aware of how I feel.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect! If I was, I would not be single. I’m the woman who tries to fix men. I will find a bad boy and dress him in a suit and tie and call him “reformed”. LOL!!! But, if I know nothing else… I know my worth! As a woman, the one thing we should not do is measure ourselves against another woman. What is even more deplorable is stomping on another woman’s success. Shame on you!

The woman in the mirror!

Instead of standing in the mirror taking duck-faced selfies, look into the depths of yourself. Again, I am not throwing stones. I have one or two duck- faced photos of myself on Instagram. Although, when I look into the mirror I rather speak positivity into myself. Mantra’s like:

“I am beautiful; We may hear it from men constantly but it means the world when you say it to yourself.”

“I am strong; It helps me through the times that I feel weak.”

“I am successful; Quiets the voice that says, you will fail.”

“I am who I say I am; Powerful against all self- doubt.”

Ever heard the saying… Why buy the milk if you can get the cow for free? I asked the women that question. Of course, I giggled at the looks of contempt. So, I explained myself. Half naked pictures advertising that you’re single. More than willing to sell your virtue for dinner and a movie. Maybe a trinket or a trip here and there. Why in hell should he put a ring on it? Newsflash ladies: Men are looking for a woman, not a girl using her looks and body for an opportunity.

Who can find a virtuous woman?

Listen for a moment! Do you hear that? Men are asking their counterparts, married homeboys, and mothers… Where do I find a virtuous woman? My brothers, guy friends, workmates, business partners ask me that very question. They claim to want a woman who is going to add stability to my life. I need an equal! You would not believe how men truly feel about women.

“Women are just as aggressive as men. You don’t have to work for it!”

“It’s ok for a one night stand but I would never take her home to meet mom.”

“She’s not wife material.”

“Women nowadays are golddiggers.”

If this is the type of woman I have to look forward to then why commit? So, men rather play the field and drink the milk of all the free cows roaming around. Once they get their fill or use up one, they move on to the other. You, my friend, are left empty and wondering what went wrong. Did you think he was the one?

You are powerful!

Stop giving up your power! He does not define who you are. Find your worth within yourself and you will attract he who is worthy of you. Decide what you can and will bring to the table and whether he is worthy to take a seat! It’s okay to eat alone!!! Once you realize that you’re worth more than rubies you will never again settle for being treated like costume jewelry.

Don’t worry ladies, I know there are two sides to a coin. Part two will talk about those men who are “dazed and confused”.

 

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#MondayMotivation for Writers.

For some of us, life throws obstacles in our way. These barriers prevent us from achieving personal goals or following our passions in life. Persevere…. make time to invest in yourself. This is a mantra I started telling myself. I found myself slowly being consumed by work and losing out on the moments that I NEED to be creative. Writing is not just a past- time for me!!! It is for my well-being and a passion. I will no longer ask permission to achieve greatness.

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#FridayFeeling!!!✍✍🎶🎶✍✍

I have been held hostage in ‘Slackerdom’!!! It’s a little kingdom that has kept me from writing as much as I usually would for Two Drops of Ink and for my personal blog. The inhabitants of Slackerdom usually visit me when I get caught up in work. They convince me that work is more important than pursuing my passion. What’s funny is I do what I love for a living. #Amwriting and doing #socialmediamangement daily but work is work. Returning home to the creative realm on a daily basis is an almost impossible trip. I fall prey to the #impossible forgetting that #I’mpossible!!! Half written compositions are evidence of my attempted voyage but I am unsuccessful in reaching my destination. I get lost along the way!!! Practice what you preach, Chica!!! Is what my creative side screams from the recesses of my being. The workaholic puts her in chains and throws her in a #Heart Shaped Box.

Today, I’m working on social media for my love… Two Drops of Ink. I have been separated from my love!!! Funny to say that when I have Live, Love, Share but Two Drops of Ink is a relationship I can’t explain. A forbidden affair that I can’t get enough of.  Live, Love, Share is a love that I take for granted but don’t want to let go. I need Live, Love, Share!!! It’s me stripped bare, truly naked, transparent with all inhibitions out the window. My readers see me and ALL my flaws. Liberation feels good!!! Allows my light to shine brighter!!!

This, my friend, is my #FridayFeeling. An attempt to Live, Love, Share! Hey, enjoy the song by Santan “Put Your Lights On” that I felt was fitting. At least in my head!!! The lyrics are poetic truth!!!

 

Featured Image: John Hain via Pixabay.com

 

 

Hello, my blogging friends!

Oh, how I did miss thee…🥀🥀🥀

Hello, my lovely friends. It is so funny how I build up quite a significant blogging momentum and then out of nowhere “BOOM.” Back down the dark empty hole of nothingness!!! The “hole of nothingness” is an inability to write. Work, Work, and more work is the culprit. Lately, I have been working so much that I feel like a zombie. I don’t like that feeling, and I try my best not to be bitten. I have had few close calls! This is my way of shooting it in the head then burning it! LOL!!! To a certain degree, I need money to live, so I have to work.  I have done just a little writing other than articles and content for websites. I have written another short story and posts for Two Drops of Ink. Work- life balance is the key, but it is easier written and talked about than actually living.

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Well,  I can’t say that I have been all work and no play. Life has been treating me quite well. I have been full of smiles, and laughter. Living in my happy field of lavender lilies and butterflies. I have had beautiful days with no real complaints. Happiness and positivity fill my heart. I’m in love with people, life and all it has to offer.

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So, this post is not to say that I’m back full time 3- 4 days per week. I don’t really foresee that happening right now. I’m just too busy for that!!!  I will post as often as I can to build back up my momentum and attempt to keep it at a steady pace.

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How has life been treating all of you? Any big news or life changing occurrences?

All images courtesy of pixabay.com.

 

 

 

 

Where in the World is Lydia?

“Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.”

― Kevin Durant

 

Where have you been hiding? When is your next post? Is everything okay? The last two weeks has been a boxing match between talent and hard work. So far it has been a draw! Maintaining a work-life balance can be quite difficult. Juggling work and personal life are quite consuming. In my opinion; I manage pretty well considering! hands-600497_640

Work and the pursuit of…. More Work.

Most of my readers are old enough to remember the geographical game and show, “Where in The World is Carmen Sandiego?” Carmen traveled the world conspiring with crooks. I love being a virtual assistant, social media manager, and freelance writer it allows me to travel the world from the comfort of my home and network with entrepreneurs and fellow writers. I find enjoyment in being a gumshoe for startup’s, nurturing my client’s social media, helping them to develop their brand, watching the business grow, their baby becomes my child. They are often surprised and pleased by what I help them to accomplish. Needless to say marketing myself on Twitter, LinkedIn and freelance sites such as Upwork.com has been vital to keeping me busy.

Writing and a writer’s life.

My blog writing has been very limited, but my writing has not stopped. Before blogging, I did content and article writing for clients websites. Freelance writing is also a wonderful way to get recognized and make money. Although, lately I have been working on my memoir, fictional novel and compositions for Two Drops of Ink.  The literary blog voted one of the “100 Best Websites for Writers” for the second year in a row. Thanks to The Write Life for recognizing such a great site, team and all of its contributing authors. Guest blogging is also an awesome way to get exposure to the writing world. Two Drops of Ink is always accepting submissions.  I have so many ideas dancing around in my head, some have been jotted down, and some are begging to be released. It would take a lifetime to give birth to every idea or maybe quit my day job. So I devote at least two hours daily in need of releasing creative pressure.

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Life at home.

We have been back home for two months. Well, at least I have! My dear Jimmy took a month off before heading back out. Which was not a part of the plan! That is the problem with passions. They can be an addiction. It is hard to live without or break free if it. Truck driving is his passion. Throughout the week he is out on the open road continuing his service to his country delivering freight and the weekends are for us. Our understanding the others need to do what we love for a living is what makes us work. Eight days to bond a month and four hours of phone time a day, I often miss my best friend. Two weeks ago we took a four day weekend together which was wonderful. Jimmy is my soul mate and so much more. In an attempt to make sure our beautiful union does not go lacking we promise to escape to the world where only we exist when we are together. It works.

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For my friends and followers who have inquired about me, I say thanks. I am here. Grateful to have such caring friends and supporters. Honored that my clients trust me with their businesses.

Images courtesy of Pixabay

 

 

Welfare… Take The Load off Taxpayers Backs!

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The American Welfare System, which was modeled after the English’s “Poor Laws” is a government program that was introduced in 1935 and available to Americans in 1939. Welfare is a government program or aide for the under privileged to be used as a stepping stone to a better life. When a person applies for welfare they are offered the following benefits:

  • Monthly cash assistance.
  • Healthcare/ medical aid.
  • Food assistance.
  • Housing subsidies.
  • Energy and utility subsidies
  • Education and childcare assistance

 

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The welfare system is a $2 Trillion-dollar price tag divided among American taxpayers. This astronomical cost only accounts for federal welfare benefits payouts. With that being said we can only imagine the actual amount spent yearly. Obviously, I have a problem with the trillions of dollars taken from hard working people. Some who still struggle to get by working 60 hours a week. I truly believe in helping those less fortunate. Although, at some point we must determine who truly is in need.

“A man who ‘REFUSES’ to work should not eat.”

Statistics states that by 1991 the work effort of those dependent on public assistance declined by 50%, only 11% worked full time or a full year. Welfare recipients average $44,000.00 a year for a family of four. This yearly allotment was supposed to be “Temporary Assistance for Needy Families”. When my research uncovered the average yearly allotment issued out, the following questions came to mind.

  • What does the government consider “temporary”?
  • Does the allotment include all benefits?
  • What is the weaning process?
  • Are people actually being reformed? If so, then why the 50% drop in employment of recipients?

The ultimate purpose of the Welfare Reform Act was to provide short term assistance and steer people into employment. Which in my opinion failed and is continuing to fail miserably! Let’s take a step back. Prior to the Welfare Reform Act, the federal government gave states a blank check allowing them to determine the needs as far as welfare. Welfare Reform came with a clause called the “Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Reconciliation Act”. The states remained in control of welfare but now they had stricter guidelines to follow. When the Welfare Reform Act was approved the federal government should have taken control of the welfare system or monitored it more closely. President Bill Clinton attempted this by giving each state a flat rate based on population. Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) would supposedly require an employment “search” in exchange for assistance. News Flash!!! Not all “needy” Americans wish to become self-sufficient. It’s easier to fabricate a job search and continue to receive financial assistance. How many social workers actually uphold the federal requirements and investigate their cases?

Who will protect the taxpayer?

It’s well past the time in America where we all must pull our weight in society! The American taxpayer is carrying the burden of others while trying to keep themselves and their families afloat. When or will we ever be relieved of the trillion-dollar load forced upon our backs? Think about the hard working college graduate and mother of two barely making $44,000.00 a year. A married couple working hard to pay mortgage and save for their children’s college education. Indeed, there are those who are needy but we must weed out the lazy or opportunists.

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Subsidize welfare and give to those who are truly deserving of help.

Five years of assistance and reformation is too long!!! Temporary Assistance for Needy Families should have a three-year lifetime limit. The requirements should be strict and closely monitored on the federal level. Thus, weeding out the truly needy from those sitting on their hands looking for a handout. Money saved from welfare cut backs can be redirected to who need it the most.

  • Elderly sixty and over who are forced to enter the workforce due to low social security benefits.
  • Mentally and physically disabled that are deemed unable to work.
  • Active military and veterans should receive any and all need requested. Including but not limited to healthcare, housing, continuing education, monthly allotment. These are the people who fight for our country and keep us safe.
  • Free breakfast and lunch in our schools.

As a taxpayer, I would rather see my hard earned money go to any of the above. Why should I be punished for being responsible and ambitious? As Americans we can #MakeAmericaGreat!!!

Money: Image courtesy of Maklay62 via Pixabay

Woman Helper: Image courtesy of PublicDomainPictures

Financial Burden: Image courtesy of Clker-Free- Vector- Images

 

Trials and Tribulations… An Opportunity for Growth.

It’s been three months that I have been out of the loop. Life has been a non- stop roller coaster ride with many trials and tribulations along the way.

Everything was wonderful…. business was going great. I had steady clients keeping me very busy, writing for my blog and two others. Doing everything I love to do for a living. Slowly, everything began to change.

My trials began with the loss of my first client due to cut backs. This was not at all alarming, it’s to be expected when working with a start up business. I made such a great impression that I knew once business picked back up I would be contacted.

Two weeks later one of my computers crashed…. I did not see that coming at all!!! I was not worried it was a back up that I used from time to time. It was mostly used by my fiancee and my step- son.  So being the technology geek that I am, I restored the computer. I saved it from going to computer heaven but it’s not like it was before the virus.

Just when I thought I made it through those two incidents unscathed in July I lost another client. Now it’s safe to say I’m in panic mode. My fiancee was laid off from his job at the chemical plant here in Montgomery and I’m making enough to just get by. The storm is now in full effect!!!

Optimistic, I’m like okay I working full- time with my last client and I still have my main computer. I have the ability to write and win new clients while I wait for past clients to need my expertise. So, I continued to work and write articles. I was too caught up in the rat race to blog or come to the couch. Many of my readers know that I refer to my blog as a therapy session.

Continuing to remain strong through all the trials and tribulations. Positive that all would end very soon on a good note. One day in August, I’m working on an article for Two Drops of Ink when my computer shut totally down. Calmly, I gave it about five minutes and attempted to power it back up. Nothing happened!!! In my mind I’m starting to panic but I remained calm and decided to end my work for the day.

The following day I powered on my computer to only see a black screen. Needless to say I’m in a full panic. In the midst of my panic I find out that my fiancee and stepson were downloading Win Games onto both machines. For those who don’t know often times hackers plant viruses on different types of sites. Game sites are very prone to carry viruses. Unfortunately, I can attest to this first hand!

I know there is a reader saying… “So whats the problem? Use the second computer!” I could and I did! The secondary computer is a slow Compaq with Windows 8. That computer was not good for everything I do on a daily basis. My main computer was a super fast HP with Windows 7 Professional and lightning fast. One week then two weeks go by and the computer would only show a black screen. Thank God I back up all my work both to the cloud as well as on disk.

Wait!!! The plot thickens…. my last client calls me one morning to inform me that we will stop work for a while. The suspend of work was not due to monetary issues but due to my ability to work at a fast pace and efficiently organize a businesses administratively. As an entrepreneur these are the types of situations that should be expected. It still pulled the rug out from under me!

Not only was Jimmy out of work so was I. Bills compile, cellular phone are disconnected and your living on credit alone. Of course depression starts to set in and I cannot make it through the night with out 2- 3 glasses of red wine. The bad out weighs the good and you only see the dark clouds. There is no rainbow when the storm over!!!

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Feeling sorry for myself, I spent many days in bed or on the couch wondering what to do next. As a believer that everything happens for a reason I had to pray. Why? Was a constant question in my mind.

I can either give up or use my circumstances an opportunity for growth. I decided to use the downtime to my advantage. Write more and revamp my virtual assisting business strategies. Learn more about computers and technical support. Most importantly spend more time with my future husband and revisiting our goals in life.

I’m grateful that in trying times Jimmy and I are able to pull together. He is definitely a great motivator and my best friend. If it was not for him and my mother I would still be in the dumps and wondering. It just goes to show that even the strong have weaknesses and need someone to lean on.

Today, I’m back in business. I’m still cleaning up but the storm is over and I do see the rainbow. The road to success is rocky and sometimes life gives us a nudge to make sure we are paying attention. If every day of our life was smooth sailing would we really have something to look forward to?  Would we be grateful for the good and the bad? How would we grow? success

May my trials and tribulations motivate others. I hope you can read this post and say she made her negatives into positives and so can I. The only war wounds I walked away with was a weight gain of thirty pounds. LOL!!! I guess I didn’t suffer too much!!!

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